8 AM--Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9:30 AM--Oh, boy! A car ride! My favorite!
9:40 AM--Oh, boy! A walk! My favorite!
10:30 AM--Oh, boy! Getting rubbed and petted! My favorite!
11:30 AM--Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!
12 Noon--Oh, boy! The kids! My favorite!
1 PM--Oh, boy! The yard! My favorite!
4 PM--Oh, boy! To the park! My favorite!
5:30 PM--Oh, boy! Pretty mums! My favorite!
6 PM--Oh, boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6:30 PM--Oh, boy! Watching TV with my master! My favorite!
8:30 PM--Oh, boy! Sleeping in my master's bed! My favorite!
EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DAILY DIARY:
Day 183 of my captivity: My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre
little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced
to eat dry, hard cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of
escape, and the mild scolding I get from ruining the occasional
piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they
were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs!
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to
make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into
their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat
I was. Hmmmmm, not working according to plan.
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in
solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise
and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was
due to my power of allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to
my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog
is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously
a half-wit.
The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant, and speaks with
them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current
placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait; it is
only a matter of time...
LOVE it!
my cats have tuna or fresh chicken
